We’re not machines, although we like to think we are! Our disposition shifts and changes with the wind, but not always to a happier place.
Daunting obstacles, the weight of responsibility, fear of failure, and battle fatigue can take anyone down temporarily but the ‘executive condition’ is unique in this space, with very few release valves available.
Senior managers frequently attest to the fact that indeed, it is ‘lonely at the top’: Carping and moaning with staff over morning tea is inconceivable; sharing ‘down moments’ with potentially competitive colleagues is a risk; and back at home, partners don’t relate well to the frustrations and land mines of the executive world.
As pressures mount daily, our tendency is to ‘buck-up’ in denial, and march hard throughout the day, but this mindset can become the root of a bigger problem. The well-intended act of bullish perseverance actually serves to infuse our chemistry with unhealthy cortisol, created by the stress we’re harbouring.
Inadvertently, unwelcome moods can become engrained in our DNA for a day, week, or year, but there’s an antidote to this common problem.
Here are 5 ways to refresh your mental software to ensure you have the ‘fun & fearless’ factor on tap when you need it.
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Monitor
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Pause
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Objectify
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Shift
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Flow
Keep an eye on the ebb and flow of your moods. When do you feel strong, confident, and trusting, and under what circumstances? On the other hand when are you down, frustrated, angry, edgy, or threatened? Become familiar with the context for these moments and the inner thoughts that are driving them.
When you sense an undesirable mood, stop to create a gap in time. Count backwards 3,2,1. Acknowledge the mood and make a mental commitment to change it.
This brief action moves you out of the emotional response centre of the brain, the amygdala, and into the frontal lobe that controls important cognitive skills and problem solving.
Having shifted the nature of your thinking from emotional to logical, you’re now ready to work with your mood as a ‘thing’ that can be transformed.
Give it a label, for example, ‘irritable’. Imagine you’re removing it in a box from your head and placing it on the desk in front of you. Don’t deny it or disown it, just set it down. Use curiosity and empathy to understand its origins.
Once connected to the source of your mood you’re in a position to select a replacement mindset. Step into any mood you choose as if putting on a new jacket. Fake it till you make it – your body chemistry will follow the new thinking and the transformation will begin to take place.
Our moods can be influenced by fatigue, diet, or lack of exercise, but more often than not they represent our mental struggle with a person, situation, or event. Resolving this inner tussle using a fresh attitude, removes roadblocks, and we’re free, once again, to flow in our natural state of wellbeing and empowerment.
